Virtual Flaneurism

The Five People You Meet as a Gay Dad

The hardest part about being a gay dad has nothing to do with raising your children. Sure, at two years old, my twins are already curious as to what a Mommy is and why we don’t have one. But explaining it to them is easy. My kids are smart, open-minded and I’m reasonably sure they’re not homophobic. It’s explaining my family to other people that gets tricky.

There are a lot of questions that can lead there. “Where’s your wife?” “Where’s their mommy?” “I wish my husband would take the kids to the park sometimes.” Or, when I’m out with my partner, the one we get is, “Which one of you is the dad?”

We could lie, but what kind of message would that send to our kids? That there’s something wrong with our family and we have to keep it secret? A much better message for them to get is that strangers can be clueless sometimes, and that it’s our job to educate them.

“We’re both the dad,” we say. And then… we wait. The next move is theirs.

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