Virtual Flaneurism

Slate is running a somewhat ridiculous column this morning written by a quasi-vegan who makes the dubious argument that oysters are a vegan-friendly food.

The author makes a few good points: oyster farms have almost no impact on the environment, the mollusks thrive when farmed, and (she argues) they do not feel pain. He even goes so far as to claim that oysters are more akin to plants that animals - though this argument is completely bogus, as oysters (1) move, (2) eat other living things and (3) have internal organs. I admit that I do not know where the line between animal and plant is drawn, but I have a general rule that things that poop are animals. And oysters poop.

I think this article misses the point that most people are vegans. Admittedly yes, oysters might not feel pain, they may enjoy living in oyster farms, and their farming may very well create no negative environmental effects. However, Cox forgets a big point on most vegans plate when it comes to skipping animals: animals, we assume, can appreciate and understand their existence - and plants do not. To eat an oyster is to end an existence that it appreciates. And that is just not within veganism.

I am not a vegetarian and never will be. I find an inherent flaw in the argument above: there is no particular reason to value animals' right to existence over plants'. Animals and plants are alive. For all we know, both can feel pain. I assure you that plants, just like animals, do not want to be hurt or eaten or killed - plants exhibit plenty of behaviors suggesting this very fact. I think the author of this article is struggling with a fact that many vegetarians and vegans choose not to address: it is inherently hypocritical to morally reject eating animals but to devour plants at will. The author goes in the opposite (and incorrect) direction, trying to justify eating an animal because "it is like a plant." This is bullshit, and the article rings false because of it. The fact is, there is no real difference between plants and animals. In turn, living beings can only exist by eating other living beings. You can't live without killing something else to do so; this is an unfortunate fact of life, but also the very foundation ensuring our continued existence.

I fully support vegetarians and vegans who reject eating meat because of the inhumane treatment of animals currently going on in most meat production plants. However, rejecting meat because it's alive while still eating plants is like stealing from the rich because the government is over-taxing the poor. You're just as guilty, but you've managed to convince yourself that the party you're wronging will not feel it.